Diminishing anger

Anger, the intense feeling of displeasure, is the most common negative emotion that people experience.

Anger, the intense feeling of displeasure, is the most common negative emotion that people experience.

by Gary Rinebarger — 

Anger, the intense feeling of displeasure, is the most common negative emotion that people experience. Mentally, an angry person is unable to think rationally or perceive reality. As the intensity of anger increases, a person’s level of objectivity decreases. This is why chronically angry individuals fail in their many attempts at success.

What about anger causes the decrease in objectivity? The same thing that controls our perceptions — beliefs!

Anger arises when we believe our expectations have not been fulfilled in the way we desire. Typically, this is because our expectations were unrealistic in the first place.

We also become angry when we believe that something we value or need is being violated or ignored; we are suffering the loss (or the perceived loss) of a tangible asset; or we believe our basic needs are not being met in some way, basic needs being a relative term.

To experience anger with less frequency and intensity, we must learn to change and control our conscious and subconscious beliefs and references about the justification and value of anger.

One way to do this is to ask questions that cast doubt about the validity of an original belief, and then decide if (1) the belief should be kept as is, (2) the belief should be modified or, (3) the belief should be discarded, and replaced by a new, more empowering belief. As we strengthen our empowering beliefs, our anger will begin to diminish.

It is difficult to remain angry if we are focused in the present moment. Remember the rule you learned as a child: to stop, take a deep breath, smile, stretch your muscles and count to 10?

By focusing on your mental ability to control your beliefs, you can determine how perceptive you will become. When you realize how damaging anger can be to your well-being, you will constantly strive to eliminate it and replace it with a more productive emotion.

 

Gary Rinebarger is a practicing hypnotherapist with the 3D Hypnosis Center. 480-593-8443.

Reprinted from AzNetNews, Volume 24, Number 3, June/July 2005.

 

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